Jessie’s Subconscious Returns!

Hi all, Jessie’s Subconscious here.  I have been dormant the last few days, clamped down by the stern gaze of Jessie and reveling in the digestive wonder that is Fried Chicken!!!! However, now that Jessie is without internet for five days and didn’t think of changing her password before she left, I can take the opportunity for another appearance!

I have a special dinner in mind.  But first, some breakfast.  Unsweetened Greek yogurt with fruit and unsweetened cereal and unsweetened peanut butter?

Yum?

Nope!  Jessie’s Subconscious wants to get back in touch with its Jewish heritage!

That’s right, Sufganiyot, aka jelly donuts!  I figured I’d get my stomach warmed up for the marathon digestion session that was to follow.  My Sufganiyot are made of a secret blend of dry ingredients, blended with a secret blend of liquid ingredients.  Hint: as with all my fried foods, there is plenty of love.

Action shot

I had to sandwich the jelly between two layers of dough, because Jessie apparently decided to bring the pastry bag attachments with her to China.

That's not jus.

Final product:

Yummy

Very tasty indeed.  I think with a pastry bag I could have piped more high fructose laden preserves into the donuts, but they were pretty tasty as is.  A true breakfast of champions.  And I needed it, because dinner was

BACON WRAPPED STUFFED SAUSAGE FATTY!!!

An impressive culinary creation that I’ve been angling to make for awhile now, but which Jessie has always overruled.  No longer!

What is a bacon wrapped stuffed sausage fatty, you ask?  Let’s view the creation process:

Step 1: form a bacon lattice.

Using my bacon ruler to ensure squareness.
Think of what I could do with a loom.

Top the lattice with a dry rub, and follow it up with sausage filling.  I used sweet Italian and flattened the filling first with a rolling pin.  Wait until Jessie tries to make whole wheat biscuits with it next time….

I topped it with tomato sauce, crispy bacon, diced ham steak, cheese, jalapeno, roasted chile flakes, and rolled it up.

What a nice profile!

Place in your smoker at 225-250 degrees until the center reaches 165 or so.  To generate smoke, I used oak cut offs from my work-in-progress table to house the smoker.

Time to smoke the fatty.
Can you spot the fatty?

See all those wires around the smoker?  That’s so I can control it anywhere I get internet or phone coverage.  Pretty neat.  Here is a readout on the cooking process:

The program that makes these wonderful logs is PC only.  Some people install Windows on the Mac to take the bar.  Others install it to log their cooks.

When done you should have something like this:

That might be jus.
Cabbage vegetable.

Crisp under the boiler for a minute and you are good to go.  What is the final verdict?  First, I will preface it by saying the prime motivator behind this project was not taste.  That being said, it was actually delicious!  If there were a picture of my face as I took that first bite, you would see an expression of rapture unlike no other.  That is assuming that Subconscii have faces.

With such a wonderful meal, it is only a matter of time until I attempt a turducken.  Have you ever had turducken?  What is the most exotic meat dish you’ve encountered?

Until next time, this is Jessie’s Subconscious bidding you tinkerty tonk!

21 Comments

  1. Bacon sausage sounds good. Bison steak is the most exotci for me so far.

  2. Jessie i laughed so much at this post because it totally reminds me of my inner desire to ravage on a bunch of meats lol. it sounds so wrong but oh so delicious!

    i just heard about bison jerky and bison pepperoni sticks. thats pretty exotic and yummy huh.

    hmm is their bison bacon?

  3. Oh this is hilarious! 🙂 I hate to say it but I would totally choose the jelly donut over the greek yogurt and cereal!! I made homemade donuts once before and wow, they were way better than any krispy kreme or dunkin donuts… if I do say so myself! 😉 YUM!

  4. OH. MY. GOSH.

    LAUGH. OUT. LOUD. The jelly donuts were amusing and elicited a smile, but I think it was the bacon wrapped stuffed sausage fatty that did the trick. The name in caps, and then the pictures. Apparently, I find pictures of fatty raw meat extremely hilarious.

    ALSO – what the hell! Your wired-up smoker is amazing!! Wait but if your prime motivator behind the fatty was not taste, what was it? I also couldn’t spot the fatty in your picture. Only the dog…

    Anyways I’ve never had turducken. I was about to google it until I figured it out. You meat-lover you!

  5. LMAO! While Jessie is away, subconscii is at play. Boy oh boy are you going to be in trouble when Jessie wakes up. I’d hide that rolling pin if I were you. Better yet, burry it and pray that the dogs don’t dig it up. My hubby would love to have a bite of that bacon wrapped stuffed sausage fatty. I think you’ve just become his new hero. To be honest, I had to google turducken. Omg! I am speechless right now! Wait till I show the hubby. Thanks for the eye opener and thanks for sharing your two not so Jessie approved foods.

    Jessie,
    I guess the obvious question would be, what are you doing traveling around China with pastry bag attachments? Crazy woman…haha. Hope you’re enjoying your trip. Remember, no videotaping while going down long flights of stairs. Can’t wait to see all your vacation pics when you get back.

  6. I’m going to give you such a finger-wagging when I get back …

    Signed,
    The Real Jessie

  7. And by finger-wagging, I mean finger-licking, as in make me more bacon-wrapped fatties, only deep-fried in that duck fat I hear you’re collecting.

    1. Har har Dave, you TOO funny … 😛

  8. omg we were just talking about turducken this weekend! We had to convince my mom it was a real thing…not that we’ve eaten it ourselves…she didn’t believe us.

    I’m trying to think of what exotic meat I’ve had…does ostrich count? That’s not very exotic is it. And bison, well we eat that here all the time, which for the record, tastes like a lovely lean beef.

  9. That bacon-wrapped loaf is such a great idea! Mike and I don’t eat pork, so I wonder if it would work with turkey bacon? Defintely worth a try! 😉

  10. OMGOSH! What a masterpiece. I want a play by play photo essay about how to do that lattice work. My oh my. If my husband saw this – he’d be in a coma. YUM! The donuts look deadly, too…. and you have a great smoker. Vanja’s dad has his own smoke house – so, no smoker for us – even if we are across the ocean!
    🙂
    Valerie

  11. You are too funny! I love this post. I used to see sufganiyot everywhere during the Hanukkah season…because of the whole oil thing, it’s a tradition (which you probably already know since A. you have Jewish heritage, or at least your subconscious does and B. You made the things from scratch). Anyway, I’ve shockingly never actually tried one myself because when I was little, I hated jam (the horror) and now I love jam/jelly but my stomach could never handle that fried little piece of goodness. I guess I just have to enjoy vicariously through you.
    I’ve never tried turducken, and I can’t say that I’ve ever tried any exotic meat dish for that matter. My dad once ate ox testicles in a soup..that’s pretty exotic, right?

  12. I’d never even heard of turducken! I love the meaty deliciousness….and the grill! What a treat 🙂

  13. Subconscii

    You are a very, very bad girl!! And my new food hero!! This is amazing!! I want one now so bad – there go all my vegan ambitions *sigh*

    Jessie

    You better come back quick…before you lose your kitchen, and your blog completely!!!! ROFL

    I’ve never had turducken and I’m not sure I want to!! It seems a bit too much for me 😛

    I don’t think I’ve ever had anything meat or otherwise that’s really exotic. I do love offal though and have eaten a lot of things that most people (at least in the Western hemisphere) would probably consider pretty “hairy” LOL

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